Think chemistry in relationships is something that “just happens?” If you do, the truth might surprise you. Sure, you probably can’t create chemistry where none exists, but if that initial spark is there, there’s plenty you can do to fan the flames.
Understand what chemistry is!
If you’ve never really felt strong chemistry with another person, it can be hard to get an idea of what it is. What most people call chemistry is a sense that the two of you are just meant to be together. You’re both perfectly at ease with each other and have a strong physical attraction for each other. While it might have something to do with looks and pheromones, most of it is mental. It comes from you and your sweetie having the same beliefs, dreams, and maybe even habits and pet peeves.
Develop a rapport!
Before you can build up any chemistry, you need to have a good rapport first. If you’ve only seen each other for one or two dates, that rapport may not quite be there yet. To create it, look for a conversation topic you can really bond over. Just make sure it’s something pleasant and low-stress, though. You may discover you both love discussing ways to end famine in Africa, but that subject doesn’t help your partner associate you with pleasure and fun.
Use humor!
Laughter is not only fun, it also makes us feel at ease with another person. You don’t have to be a professional comedian. Even an attempt at humor in your own style can work. Just keep it clean and neutral so you don’t offend your date right off the bat.
Adrenaline is your friend!
Studies have shown that couples who met in an exciting situation – whether pleasurable or not – tend to find each other more attractive. More so than couples who met under normal circumstances. It works because the mind associates any excitement with the person we’re with at the time and mistakes it for physical attraction. Make use of this by planning a date that will get the adrenaline pumping like a scary movie, a roller coaster ride, or even whitewater rafting.
Express yourself!
You can’t have chemistry in relationships with people who don’t know the real you. Instead of keeping your opinions to yourself in hopes of hiding anything your partner might not like about you, make it a point to share your thoughts and feelings about important issues. Sometimes just a single off-hand comment can make your date fall for you hard.
Enhance the physical!
Some tips for how to increase chemistry in relationships will tell you to touch your date on the knee or arm early on. You want to be careful with that, though. Get physical too early on and you could just end up turning your partner off. Instead, start by just talking about what physical features you each find most attractive in the opposite sex and then using the info you gain to your advantage.
Filed under Dating - Relationships Advice by on Nov 4th, 2010. 
Are you really in love? Quizzes can help you find out, but you have to make sure you take the right ones. Take one of those short little tests you find in popular magazines and you’ll probably just end up even more confused than you were before. Before you make that mistake, here are some guidelines for finding a good quiz.
What the Quiz Can Tell You
Most of the time, it’s hard to go wrong with trusting your “gut instincts.” For instance, if you feel like you’re in danger, it’s nearly always a good idea to get out of the situation even if there’s no obvious sign of danger.
Well, the problem with here is that both love and infatuation are such powerful emotions they cloud your ability to tell which is which (Yeah, like you really need me to tell you that). Sometimes, you just can’t trust your instincts to lead you to a good relationship.
By asking questions that help separate feelings that could lead to deep, long-lasting love from those that will disappear, “are you really in love” quizzes keep you from wasting energy on mere infatuation or lust. Even more importantly, they then help you from getting sucked into what could be a very unpleasant, messy romantic entanglement.
What the Quiz Should Ask You
If you actually want to get some real benefits from taking one of the “are you really in love” quizzes available, you need to know how to sort the accurate ones from the useless ones. Usually, just glancing through the questions will give you a good idea of how accurate the quiz will be. This is usually easy enough to tell by glancing at the questions. The quiz should be asking such things as whether you are willing to share your deepest secrets with this person or is he/she in the top 5 of the people you respect above all others.
It should also include questions that help you separate initial infatuation that could bloom into a deeper, true love from feelings that aren’t likely to lead to anything serious. The test should ask how your love makes you feel about yourself, what emotions characterize your relationship, and how much you sacrifice for your partner. Questions like these zero in on common differences between love, infatuation, and lust.
Where to Find Quality Quizzes
As I mentioned above, popular magazines really aren’t the best places to find quizzes. The problem is, unless the writer’s bio is included, you can’t be sure the person who created the quiz is a true expert on relationships or not. That’s why it’s better to look for quizzes in books and Web sites written by credible relationship experts.
Taking a few well designed quizzes can give you a lot of insight into whether or not your relationship has any real future. Finding out early on if your relationship is on the wrong track can save you a lot of stress and heartache in the long run. Just make sure you get your quiz from a credible source, be completely honest in your answers, and read the results of “are you really in love” quizzes with an open mind.
Filed under Senior Dating by on Oct 20th, 2010.